I’ve always subjected myself to a sense of guilt whenever I thought about my choice to begin and to remain in showbiz. The reason is because I see it as an extremely self indulgent industry, where I really do enjoy my work. The diversity of it and the opportunity to explore areas of life I would never have a chance to if I landed somewhere else are charming factors to me.
Growing up, I have always thought I would end up in a job related to humanities. An urban geographer, researcher of some sort or a community worker. Like many social idealists, I wanted to make a difference in the world. The current path I have taken seems rather hypocritical.
Blame it on my inqusitive nature, my vanity, my restlessness, I am who I am now.
However, thanks to an unexpected conversation with my grandmother, I managed to lift myself out of the conundrum.  In a nutshell, over the phone one day, my grandmother was chirping excitedly over my latest drama serial. “我喜欢看新加坡的戏。。每一个我都追的。。看电视我就开心: she quipped.
Those simple words reminded me of how 搞笑行动 used to make my Mondays less blue, how Aiyoyo 老师 made school seem like a second home.
Perhaps, I should go easy on myself. If souls are invisible, immeasurable, then surely the work of an artist is incalculable. Showbiz, entertainment industry,  artistic realm, whatever you name it, we reach out to the hearts of people and leave imprints with our creation.
As I move on, I now have a deeper understanding of what my work pertains. My industry is an enormous Kaleidescape, encapsulating life in the expressions of dramas, songs, performances. I express you, I represent you, I am you.
So, now, what’s wrong with indulging in life, loving life.

Very soon, we shall meet again for the annual gathering coming up next. After 2 years of outdoor adventures, or some say torture, I promise to rest your feet and fill your tummy this time round. But it will not be a lazy event, as I always believe we should grab every opportunity to learn something new.

Registration is closed for now and for those who have registered, I look forward to seeing you. For those who missed it, come on board and write to thepaigeconnexion@gmail.com to be in the team.

I never thought I will be so attached to the outcome of star awards this year. Maybe because, this year I bothered to ask….. To understand what the procedure is like, what my fans had to go through,why they feel the need to win, to make calls, to impatiently await the results daily.

I am part of the team this year, and “ouch” when you get this involved.

In the past years, it was a 3 hour event with minimum sweat, except for my suffering feet which are stuck in those killer heels. The top 10 awards is the battle of the fan clubs.

I was aware of the additional hassle this year my supporters had to go through as the security had tightened for the online voting category. And still, they soldiered on, and delivered “beautifully “till the last minute. Hopes were high as my picture and my name was comfortably located everyday and very night’s battle was rightfully won.

This, when we lost the war, it came extremely hard. Lots of “why”, tears, and guilt. It was hard not to be affected. It wasn’t life or death, or extreme situations, like what I have witnessed during AJ2, or Renovaid. I guess it was the sense of communal lost that we had as a team.

Something so apparently elusive could feel so real, I guess, that’s what desires are.
Hey guys, we did good, I’m proud, we should be.

For better or for worse, this unfortunate event made all of us start to think, to awake from our comfortable slumber, to realise that things can go wrong on our land.

Like many, I was saddened to see images of Little India on the dreadful night, and the stories that they brought along. People were hurt, not just physically, and emotionally.

It brought trauma to the seemingly calm perspective of the Singapore landscape.

But I was not surprised. Honestly, I was not the only one.

How many reports have we read on the abuses that were inflicted onto the blue collar foreign workers? We have all witnessed at some point through various media about their terrible living conditions, and testimonials of their laborious work lives.We are a rich country,upgrading our homes generation after generation, and here’s the hard truth…..

We rest in the blood and sweat of thousands who don’t even have a proper bed space.

I came in contact with foreign construction workers a few years back when I was volunteering with Yvonne, the brown lady from ” Everyday Heroes” .

She was empathetic towards the quality of life of the construction workers and laboured daily to bring them useful materials, extra food supplies or just being a local friend to them. Hundreds queue for a bag of pastry, a bundle of vegetables and the hearty smiles Yvonne received in return is good enough for her to toil for another day. She told me many are shortchanged in their wages, not fully compensated when injuries occurred, (if there is any coverage at all), harsh living conditions, with little sympathy from their employers, or agencies. A host of grievances with no options.

Why does Yvonne do this? Because there is no one else.

Now, are you still surprised at why it happened?